Jungle Cruise is a must-see when I visit a Disney park, but I can count on one hand the number of outstanding Jungle Cruise skippers I've encountered in the past ten years. In fact, I can count them on two fingers, those two fingers representing Emily and Ian, who guided my family around the world's most exotic and treacherous rivers during my December trip to Disney World.

Our first trip through, Emily delivered the standard Jungle Cruise spiel like a female Sam Kinison, punctuating the ride's high points with yelling that you'd think would be annoying, and might be were it not hilarious. After the cruise with Emily, my 3-year-old niece seemed entranced by the ride; as the park was relatively empty, we asked for--and got--a repeat trip. And Emily switched out with Ian. Ian was even more remarkable, gliding around the front of the boat like a compact Jim Carrey crossed with Fred Astaire, yet also prone to breaking out in Gilbert and Sullivan-style light opera. If it sounds crazy, it was, but it was crazy-good.

To be fair to the other skippers I've seen, most of them are at least adequate. A few are good; at least one or two have been outright terrible. But Emily and Ian were inspired; seek them out next time you're in Florida.