B.O.R.E.D. - May 21, 2004

B.O.R.E.D.
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by Daniel Kaplan (archives)
May 21, 2004
In this week's B.O.R.E.D. Daniel talks about NBC, Universal and Revenge of the Money plus more criticisms of modern culture.

B.O.R.E.D
Box Office Reported Eloquently by Daniel

NBC and Universal
It's an exciting week for Universal.  First the announcement comes of the NBC merger finally going though, and then there's also the Revenge of the Mummy attraction opening at Universal Studios Florida.  It will be interesting to see how the NBC merger plays out, as many industry experts predict the sale of the parks.  I'm not exactly sure who could buy it, as the parks would be in the billions of dollars.  Although it is a little strange thinking about tie-ins like Friends the Ride being built at the parks.  Revenge of the Mummy is probably going to play a large factor in the whole process.  The success of the attraction will be an interesting thing to follow, with so far reviews of the Florida attraction being cautiously positive.  Disney has not had a major competion in Florida since Islands of Adventure, which did not meet expectations.  If Revenge of the Mummy brings in extra crowds to Universal, and Animal Kingdom or Disney MGM Studios attendance stays flat or drops a little than Universal Studios Florida could for the first time beat a Disney park.  In a way, that almost would be fun to see happen since it would keep things a little exciting.

 
Numbers on Shirts
You know a trend I've been noticing people do lately is where numbers on their shirts that don't mean anything.  Like somebody will have say, 83 on their shirt and the value doesn't have any significance to them.  I've asked people why they have shirts with that number and they respond, "'Cause it was on the shirt."  I don't know about you, but I feel strange wearing shirts that just have random numbers on them for no apparent reason.  It would be like buying a shirt that was a solid color, but in Arial font in the center just having the word "tree" for no reason at all.  Wouldn't that be strange?  Now I understand wearing jerseys or something wear the number specifically fits into the design, but even then it should have some sort of significance.  Like maybe it represents a player you like, or you just like the sound of the number.  I would even accept somebody wearing a number because if you add it up it means something, or the multiplier, or the square root, or it rhymes with something, really I would accept just about any reason.  It makes me wonder why people shop at all.  Why not just give the store your credit card, tell them the amount to charge and let them shop for you.  You know on a second thought looking at what people wear it would probably be a big improvement.
 
The Jungle Cruise Movie
Wow, just a few weeks after Disney makes the announcement that there will be no more theme park attraction films, out pops the Jungle Cruise movie.  One might wonder if Alamo's disappointing box office and early worries about King Arthur has them trying again to recapture the live-action market.  It seems like a rather hard attraction to convert into a film.  Do you make it a comedy or a dramatic adventure film?  A little bit of of both?  Will the film feature a wise-cracking skipper?  How about the "back side of water"?  The rhino chasing the safari up the tree? Albert Falls?  Will the animals be real or be audio-animatronic replicas?  Will the use Chief Name (WDW) or Trader Sam (Disneyland)?  Will the film be set in the 1930s?  It's hard to imagine a 90 minute plot line based on the Jungle Cruise, but ironically enough a while back I did a parody piece where I mentioned the Jungle Cruise movie as a joke.  My plot line involved a successful comedian getting stranded in the jungle after a plane crash then starting a touring company.  After becoming popular with his wise-cracking tours, the comedian stays in the jungle to continue the world famous Jungle Cruise.
 
Classic Quote of the week: "I guess I now have an outlaw, for an in-law." King Richard from Robin Hood
Tragic Quote of the Week: "No, no, not on the treehouse!" Ape from George of the Jungle
 
Box Office
Shrek 2 moves into over 4,000 theaters this weekend.  That's a record by a large margin and almost guarantees a bigger opening weekend than Finding Nemo.  With the Wednesday and Thursday grosses diminished with school being in session, watch for Shrek 2 to really clean up over the 3 day period.  Troy unfortunately has been met with lukewarm response and it now seems impossible for it to even dream of a $180+ ending.  This leaves more room for other films, especially The Day After Tomorrow to reap box office rewards.
 
This Weekend's Top 10

#1  - Shrek 2 $72.1 million
#2  - Troy $22 million
#3  - Van Helsing $9.1 million
#4  - Mean Girls $6.7 million
#5  - Man on Fire $3.1 million
#6  - Breaking all the Rules $2.6 million
#7  - 13 Going on 30 $2.6 million
#8  - New York Minute $2.2 million
#9  - Laws of Attraction $1.4 million
#10 - Kill Bill Vol 2 $1.2 million

 Last weekend accuracy 82.63%
 
If it were a Disney Film. . .Shrek 2 would be a. . .well that's just a stretch, I'm sorry I can't even do that one.

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-- Daniel Kaplan
-- Posted May 21, 2004