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The Humor Mill
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by Daniel Kaplan (archives)
June 3, 2005
Daniel returns with a new column. Or at least a new name.

The Humor Mill

Not sure if I like the title, but I've thought it about it for 2 weeks and this one was my favorite.
Welcome to a new a column here at LaughingPlace.com! Here at From the Humor Mill I will give my opinions about various topics, both incredibly important and ridiculously trivial. This column is going to be a fun and somewhat silly take at the world of Disney and entertainment in general. So grab your cokes, pineapple whips, churros, turkey legs, popcorn, pretzels, hot dogs, Bengal freezes, funnel cakes, chocolate chip cookies or whatever Disney snack food of choice and enjoy From the Humor Mill.

In the News...
In an astounding turn-of-events, the Orange County Register is reporting that Disneyland's 50th anniversary is creating a positive economic effect on Orange County. Surprising that the #1 theme park in America celebrating it's 50th anniversary could have such an effect isn't it? But sadly throughout all this celebrating another major milestone has been lost. On September 24th, the Miami Seaquarium is celebrating it's golden anniversary. Perhaps it's marketing campaign as the "Happiest 'Shellebration' on Earth" isn't striking a chord with consumers.
And speaking of oceans, Ocean Park has been featured in a BusinessWeek article discussing it's upcoming overhaul. It's response to Hong Kong Disneyland is an impressive $700 million dollars expansion. This is sure to bring it more success than Hong Kong's third-most popular theme park attraction, the coin-key jumping frog ride at the mall.
On the business side, Disney Visa has released new credit card designs. One features the 50th castle logo, two feature Mickey and friends and the third features Bambi and Flower. Other designs featuring Scrooge McDuck and Prince John counting stacks of money must have never made it off the ground floor.
The Walt Disney Internet Group has reported that FamilyFun.com received over 40% year-to-year increases for April Fool's Day and Valentine's Day. With these sort of numbers it makes you wonder what kind of traffic they got on National Grape Popsicle Day on May 28th and will get on National Iced Tea Day coming up on June 10th.
Disney has a new VP of Corporate Communications, Dave Caoette. He joins the company from AT&T Wireless. In an interesting news event, Disney asked to see some notes from his meetings from his former employer. He of course, had to explain that there aren't any rollover minutes. Ok that was bad.
In music Disney announced a Chronicles of Narnia album by famous Nashville stars. I've had the pleasure of hearing the preview of the first track, "Ballad of Aslan"
Came from a mountain top in Narnia
Something from Sid and Marty Kroft
His favorite holiday is Mardi Gras and
White stuff on an English muffin's farnia
Aslan, Aslan the Lion
One big allegory
Disney returns to the novelty music genre with Mousercise. I don't know about you, but I can sleep more soundly now that I know that "Ducks Dance Too" will be around for another generation of listeners.
And on that note, I present. . .the list!
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