Picture this: You’re a big Disney fan (hard to imagine, right?) and you traveled to the D23 Expo. After seeing that Disney Store was planning to have some exclusive merchandise, including pins, shirts, dolls and Tsum Tsums (TSUM TSUMS!!!) you decided that you absolutely must go to there as part of your weekend inside the Anaheim Convention Center. In the words of Cruella De Vil, “You fool! You… you IDIOT!!!”

If you weren’t there, you’re probably thinking “What’s the problem?” And if you were there, you’re probably reliving the panic attack you had there because you know from experience that this was an absolute mess. Disney Store wouldn’t have looked so bad if the Dream Store hadn’t been a shining example of how to do it right. Yes they had lines, but man did they get you in and out quickly and efficiently!

Again, I can’t stress enough the drastic difference between the two stores…

In addition to offering exclusive, limited edition merchandise with special releases each day to keep you coming back, Dream Store also offered artist signings inside their store beyond the massive checkout area that made sure you didn’t wait long to give them money.

You may have heard about the “Store Pass,” a Fast Pass-type ticket to let you wait in a shorter line to shop, but they were gone for most stores within minutes of the show floor being open, so it accomplished very little.

And even when there was a line, it moved!

Relative to what, you ask? Disney Store… the bain of the D23 Expo this year. True villains in every way. Granted, Mickey’s of Glendale also had a significant line throughout the day, but their store was smaller and their cast at least knew what merchandise they had. Oy!

Also guests seemed pretty pleased with their overall experience at the Imagineering exclusive shop, even though the wait was long.

Let’s start by observing that this is Disney Store’s third time at the D23 Expo. Somehow, they haven’t learned a darn thing from the past. It’s as if nobody wrote down any notes to say “Let’s change things up next time.” Obviously, they don’t give a hoot if you enjoy your time there. Just give them your money and move on. Buh-bye!

So obviously they knew it would be living hell when they tweeted this, amiright?

Don’t patronize me…

So you waited outside the convention center for hours to be among the first in line at the store on the show floor only to wait at least another hour to enter the store. Meanwhile, nobody was nice to each other. Tensions were high with the realization that the edition sizes were so freakishly low that you would need a fairy godmother to teleport your treasure out of the scalper up front’s hands.

Also they wasted another 20 minutes of your time with their ridiculous opening ceremony. Just let the people in the friggin’ store, you jerks! Do you even want the money in my pocket?

By the way, if you were in the line, you couldn’t actually see the front of the store to watch these shenanigans, which were repeated all three days. Nobody really stopped to watch either, just glimpsed it while on their way to something not so… I don’t know… stupid?

And then there were two lines! There was the cute one on the immediate side of the store that took about 60 minutes to meander through. As you approached it, you were dismayed to learn that the true end of the line is yonder. Oh boy, here it comes. Brace yourselves.

So while this happened in front…

It was like this everywhere else.

It’s like the way North Korea makes you think things aren’t so bad, but really it’s le mis. Disney Store looked like tons of fun from the front, but was really a nightmare. Obviously first world problems, lets keep some things in perspective.

On point. But seriously.

No! Not the Tsum Tsums!

That seems ‘spensive, but I have to have it. Wait, what do you mean it’s already sold out? You’ve been open for less than an hour!

Yes, you did. And now they are going to sell your soul to a fan, limited edition of 1. Copyright Disney. All sales are final. No returns. No exchanges. Buh-bye!

https://twitter.com/JubilantJane/status/632262910190882816

A recurring theme. In reality, they had no clue. Don’t trust a word the Disney Store cast says. They were super-dee-duper nice, but not empowered at all. Not only did they not know what was released today or what was still in stock, they also couldn’t give you any information about what would be there tomorrow. Do you want to camp out all night to be surprised by something you maybe don’t care about? Rude!

https://twitter.com/JubilantJane/status/632263366505947136

You are correct! Get out of the line…

Good for you! A model citizen, let us all learn from his lesson.

Say what?!?!?

How kind of them. But since they didn’t bother to go through the line with, say, wristbands for the rest of the stuff, the likelihood of them still having what you wanted by the time you got in store was nearly impossible.

It won’t be, sweetie honey baby child.

Probably.

 

Le cute! Le sad! Le cry!

Wait a minute… stuff was gone, right? Why were they even allowing people to get in line still?!?!?

Since it felt like how I imagine dying will be, God’s probably waiting for you at the end.

Backhanded dealings? Not quite. Turns out the cast at Disney Store missed a few boxes. So when they told people earlier that the Tsum Tsums were gone and they couldn’t have one, they weren’t gone. Meaning people farther back in line had the opportunity to get what they couldn’t. Have a magical day!

About time. And since this is Friday, there’s still two more days of fun in store for you! Be sure to get in line outside the convention center right now if you want anything tomorrow. 🙂

https://twitter.com/shoohead/status/632421334300004352

Since Disney is a mega-huge company that truly operates like a bunch of smaller business with the same owner, good luck. Also please come back tomorrow and wait in line to not buy anything. Okay? Buh-bye!

So Day two should have had lowered expectations, right? Find out on the next page.

 

Alex has been blogging about Disney films since 2009 after a lifetime of fandom. He joined the Laughing Place team in 2014 and covers films across all of Disney’s brands, including Star Wars, Marvel, and Fox, in addition to books, music, toys, consumer products, and food. You can hear his voice as a member of the Laughing Place Podcast and his face can be seen on Laughing Place’s YouTube channel where he unboxes stuff.

 

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