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It’s that time again! Time to break out the Quicksteps and Foxtrots, because it’s Dancing with the Stars time! This morning on Good Morning America, the new cast was announced to fanfare and confusion, so it’s only right to break them down. Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome your couples! BA BA DA BA BA BA BA BA BA DA BA BA!

Jonathan Bennett, host of MTV’s Copycat, but most known for his role in Mean Girls as Aaron Samuels, the “dreamsicle” for Lindsey Lohan, then Regina George, then back to Lindsey Lohan. He has been paired with Allison Holker. He takes on the place of James Maslow from last season, the relatively young stud with a rather large fan base in younger demographics. I’m expecting him to be a breakout hit, and not a hit by a bus. There are going to be so many ripe opportunities for Mean Girls puns, I’m so excited.

Tommy Chong, part of the famed Cheech and Chong comedy duo, is paired with Peta Meurgatroyd. I feel incredibly bad for Peta, my bae, as this is going to be a Billy Dee Williams scenario, where we all know they suck, and they will continue to suck as long as they are on the show, but they are over 50 so we find them ADORABLE!

Randy Couture, MMA Champion, is paired with Karina Smirnoff. If he is going to take any DWTS stereotype, I’m going with the “Football player who we didn’t expect much from, but dances his way to a Mirrorball”. Yes, that is a specific stereotype. I love Karina, and she does great work, but when you are working with someone who does an unintentional “Weekend at Bernie’s” impression, it may be hard to do any choreography with that.

Betsey Johnson is paired with Tony Dovolani and I am so freaking excited. She is known for being crazy when she unveils new collections on the runway, ending her shows with splits and cartwheels, so  we know she has flexibility. Her costumes are going to be crazy and I am praying to the Mirrorball gods that she dances well, because I’m going to be her biggest champion.

Lolo Jones, track and field/bobsled Olympian, is paired with new pro Keo Motsepe. She seems like she will follow the same trajectory as other Olympians (Meryl, Apollo, etc.). That’s really all I have to say, because as of now, this seems like it’s going to be the boring pair.

Bethany Mota, YouTuber extraordinaire, is paired with Derek Hough. While many don’t think of YouTubers as “celebs,” trust me, they are. She just won the Teen Choice Award for Female Online Star, which shows that she has a large following of a younger demo, which is just what the show needs. She already has a good chance of winning because of her pairing with Derek. So excited to see what she brings to the ballroom, and I hope this allows for more YouTubers to make the journey to the show.

Janel Parrish, Pretty Little Liars star, is paired with Val Chmerkovskiy, and ABC knows what they are doing with this casting decision. She died on the show about a week ago, so why not put her on the show?! She will hopefully bring along her teen demographic to the show, and she looks like her and Val will have good chemistry.

Alfonso Riberio, Carlton from Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, is paired with Witney Carson, and this seems like it is going to be the funny pair. They already seem to have great chemistry, and he has dance experience as a kid (Remember the Michael Jackson Pepsi commercial?), so I’m looking forward to their first dance.

Sadie Robertson, Duck Dynasty star, will be dancing with Mark Ballas this season. This is by biggest “I have no clue” pairing, as Mark is great (His single “Get My Name” is pretty darn catchy), but who knows about his partner. The Duck Dynasty fan base is dwindling quickly, as ratings for the show are quickly plummeting, so I’m not entirely sure she’ll be able to stay a long time, unless she is a fantastic dancer, which I’m not positive about either. Really up in the air.

Antonio Sabato Jr. from The Bold and the Beautiful is dancing with Cheryl Burke. He’s a Soap Star. NEXT!

Tavis Smiley, political talk show host, is dancing with Sharna Burgess. Here’s a link to his partner photo. That says it all.

Lea Thompson, from Back to the Future and Switched at Birth, will be dancing with Artem Chigvintsev. She looks like she’ll be the Candace Cameron of this season, beloved by all, yet isn’t the best dancer. Either way, she seems to have some prior dance experience and is already a fan favorite, so let’s see what she brings to the ballroom.

Michael Waltrip, NASCAR driver, will be dancing with Emma Slater. He was cracking so many jokes on Good Morning America this morning, so he seems to be bringing great energy and personality to the show, but who knows what he’ll bring in the dancing department. He could be like a Helio, or be like a Billy Dee, it’s a toss-up.

Julianne Hough will be joining the judging panel this season when it premieres on Monday, September 15th at 8pm on ABC. I’ll be back then with my first recap of the season!

 
 

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