I Present To You: Alternative Options for That NFL Mascot Merchandise Collab

With the reveal of the full lineup of NFL Disney Mascots as part of a new collaboration today with a new collection of Champion Merchandise, I couldn't help but wonder if there were some more obvious mascot picks. The official lineup is great an all, but feels a bit too marketing specific. It makes sense given the point is to move merchandise, but there are a lot of other characters - especially in the world of animation - that might fit better.

Looking at a pantheon of characters from Walt Disney Pictures, Walt Disney Animation Studios, Disney Television Animation, Pixar Animation Studios, and even some of the Disney Parks, I have made a few other selections that I think might not be as random as those official selections.

Washington Commanders - Buzz Lightyear

While the official collab may have put Buzz Lightyear on a different team, and threw Evil Dr. Porkchop himself, Hamm, as the mascot for the team, we're going to go ahead and throw this guy - famously of Star Command - as the mascot for the Commanders.

If we needed an actually ranked Commander, kind of appropriate for Washington, we'd have to look toward Commander Lyle Tiberius Rourke from Atlantis: The Lost Empire.

Dallas Cowboys - Woody

I mean, you can't go wrong with the official selection of Woody for the Cowboys. He is referred to throughout the Toy Story franchise as "Cowboy," "Old Cowboy Toy," or even "Wimpy Cowboy Doll." Even if you just Google "famous Disney cowboy," Woody comes up first. So, realistically this was the best option here. However, as I am a fan of deep cuts and obscurity for no other reason than deep cuts and obscurity, I'd also have to bring up Alameda Slim from Home on the Range. There are so many other wild west figures that could have been put in place too, but don't worry- the NFL loves them some western-themed mascots.

Philadelphia Eagles - Sam Eagle

Come on guys, it was right there. The literal Eagle (yes a Muppet eagle, but still), who represents and stands for all the values of America. You know, the country that was founded in - where? - PHILADELPHIA. Instead you chose a character simply because of a color scheme and (let's be real) an upcoming major motion picture with Doctor Doom. There was no real reason other than that.

The NFL sure does love their bird mascots though, so as a secondary option I had to go with the grandest Eagle we could think of and say Marahute from The Rescuers Down Under.

New York Giants - Willie the Giant

We could have had a newer more memorable (and arguably marketable) Giant character from the animated world, but that movie got cancelled. Sorry, Gigantic. Instead, I have to go way back for a literal giant with Willie the Giant from Mickey and the Beanstalk as seen in Fun & Fancy Free. It's the first go to, but you could also pick from any of a large swath of Disney villains who themselves become enormously giant (Jafar, Ursula, etc), or even Chernabog from Fantasia as he is a giant that is formed out of a mountain. Yeah, Wreck-It Ralph is quite large compared to his video game colleagues (and does increase in size digitally thanks to a virus in the second film), its not a huge stretch but kind of a stretch to make him the mascot here.

Chicago Bears - The Bear from The Fox and The Hound

Baloo is a solid pick for the Chicago Bears, even with his big city attitude in the wilds of The Jungle Book. While he does come to Mowgli's defense a number of times, he might be, dare I say, too soft to be a football mascot. We need an aggressive bear. While I can point to countless other bear options, and as much as I want to bring up Brother Bear wherever I can, I have to think of the most aggressive Disney bear I know. The Bear from The Fox and the Hound. Serving as the centerpiece in a fight in a climactic moment of the film, the scary bear from the movie is one of things that viewers most remember from the 1981 film.

Detroit Lions - Simba

The official selection was spot on. No notes.

As a joke, I might also point to Tim Taylor from ABC's Home Improvement. But that would be full circle, and perhaps too meta.

Green Bay Packers - Monterey Jack

Perhaps as a bit of commentary regarding this team and always letting the Wookiee win, the official mascot selection was Chewbacca for the Green Bay Packers. However, the first thing that one might think of with this team? - Cheese. And no other character lusts for cheese like a cheesehead than Monterey Jack from Chip 'N' Dale Rescue Rangers. He is obsessed with the delicacy, and is easily distracted at any moment by it. While we can point to other mice, including Gus & Jaq from Cinderella or Ratatouille's Remy, it's Monterey Jack who really takes the cake here.

Minnesota Vikings - The Three Headed Troll from EPCOT's Maelstrom

While long gone, the deepest of divers into the Disney fandom have a few options of word association when they hear "Viking." While some might think of a deleted prologue from Atlantis: The Lost Empire, a large swath of Disney fans (especially those of the parks) will immediately think of Maelstrom at EPCOT. While the Norway-themed ride closed over a decade ago, it is still remembered fondly. One of the most memorable moments of the attraction is an encounter with a three-headed troll, arguably the signature moment of the attraction.

That said, that is some pretty deep lore there, so Thor does make more sense from a recognizability standpoint. We're just wishful thinking a bit.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers - Captain Jack Sparrow

Official selection, Captain Hook, seems so easy right? Buccaneer. Pirate. Disney. Captain Hook. Well.... looking at what a Buccaneer actually is - a pirate, especially one who raided Spanish ships and settlements in the Caribbean during the 17th and 18th centuries - Captain Hook and his pirate crew in Neverland don't really seem to fit here. So, I look to Pirates of the Caribbean (the film and the attraction) and would have to pick one of the significant characters - Captain Jack Sparrow. Featured in both the film, and eventually, the attractions. Recently, we have also had the alteration and addition of Redd in the auction scene, who might also lend herself well as a mascot to the team's color scheme.

Atlanta Falcons - Hayabusa

There are so many birds in the NFL, and for the Falcons I have to look to an actual falcon (not just a spaceship like the official selection of the Millennium Falcon). In doing so, I have to pick the only one I can think of with ease, Hayabusa from Mulan. Typically accompanied by the film's villain, Shan Yu, the antagonistic sidekick is already accustomed to being around intimidating types making a role as a football mascot quite easy.

Carolina Panthers - Bagheera

While the animation fan in me will side with the decision to make The Jungle Book's panther, Bagheera, the mascot of the Carolina Panthers, I do have to wonder. There is a lot of Marvel presence on the official selection list, why not the obvious go-to of Black Panther in this spot. That said, I'll still choose Bagheera as well as a fan of animated animals, but I'm still giving an honorary mention to the Marvel hero who's name is also the mascot. Come on, guys.

New Orleans Saints - Louis

Again, capturing the spirit of both New Orleans and the team, Louis from The Princess and the Frog is quite a good selection. If anything, I would also say that Ray from the same film - who yes is a star amongst others like Evangeline - could also be an angel or a saint. Spoilers sure, but its been over 15 years. But overall agreement with Louis is found here.

Arizona Cardinals - Flapjack (The Owl House)

Now, quite a deep cut and leaving the big screen for the smaller one in recent years, for the Arizona Cardinals I would pick an actual cardinal - or one more closely tied to a cardinal than A PARROT like Iago, the official selection. I would assign Flapjack from Disney Channel's The Owl House as the mascot for this team. Sure, technically a magical creature in the series called a Palisman, at least Flapjack is basically a cardinal with magical powers and comes a lot closer to the bird on the team than a wisecracking Gilbert Gottfried parrot - a parrot that has teeth in his beak, mind you.

San Francisco 49ers - Stinky Pete

Nail on the head here once again, if not for a lack of option. Sure they could have really promoted the S.E.A. with Barnabas T. Bullion or even just the goat with dynamite from Big Thunder Mountain Railroad, but Stinky Pete from Toy Story 2 is perfect. I just wonder if he had to promise any roles in upcoming Toy Story movies to get the part.

Side note, the official declaration names him as "Pete the Prospector," but the real ones know - he's Stinky Pete.

Official Selection: "Pete the Prospector"

Los Angeles Rams - Wall of Goat from Kiff

Sulley from Monsters, Inc. was chosen, likely because he has the horns of a ram for the team mascot here. However, I go back to television for another choice here - the Wall of Goat from Disney Channel's Kiff. Sure they're still not rams, but they still have the horns and are closer in the animal family than a closet monster from Monstropolis. I would also point to Doug Ramses from Zootopia, but the Breaking Bad jokes and send-ups might not fly as well as a football mascot.

Seattle Seahawks - Orville or Wilbur

Really, the selection of the team mascot came to any other seagulls other than the Finding Nemo seagulls. Since 2003 we have heard the "mine mine mine" call whereever it could be squeezed and done to death. Merchandise. Animatronics. Commercials. Eating outside in public. Everywhere. With that, you can pick either seagull from The Rescuers or The Rescuers Down Under, or even Scuttle from The Little Mermaid.

Buffalo Bills - Chief Bogo

The official selection for the Buffalo Bills, the Beast from Beauty and the Beast, is actually an amalgamation of a number of other creatures, including a buffalo. But why not a full Buffalo, and pick Chief Bogo from Zootopia. We could even channel more Disney Parks fun - though more obscure - and pick Buff from the Country Bear Jamboree.

Miami Dolphins - King Triton

I feel, after looking up a swath of other dolphin characters, that King Triton (the official selection) was also the only option. Carried everywhere on a chariot pulled by dolphins, this Sea King might have been the best option for the Miami team. While in my heart of hearts, Terra the adopted Dolphin sister to StuGo's Merian is a solid option, the reality of that character and that one-season Disney Channel animated series, is dare I say, too obscure.

New York Jets - Pedro the Mail Plane (Saludos Amigos)

In my own personal mission to never acknowledge the(not Pixar) film, Planes, outside sentences such as this - I would go far back in Disney history and pull up Pedro the Mail Plane from Saludos Amigos or even Siddely from Pixar's Cars 2 as a mascot for the Jets. Both, and sure, even a pick from Planes would somehow be better than the seemingly random pull of Buzz Lightyear, simply because he has wings - and in some imaginative scenes - jets. Especially considering the name of the team comes from the placement of Shae Stadium between two airports.

New England Patriots - Amos (Ben & Me)

Admittedly, Captain America is a solid choice for the New England Patriots, and the team did good picking that one. While not as intimidating as a Marvel hero though, I look to the animated mouse that helped Ben Franklin, one of the founding fathers of the country, do so many great things as depicted in the animated short film, Ben & Me - Amos. Complete with tri-fold cap and period attire, the mouse can appear across jerseys, helmets, etc. and keep that Americana feel.

Alternatively, I would have to look to Carl from Pixar's Up as a potential mascot here - simply because he knew how to inflate all those balloons to make his house fly. That's all.

Cincinnati Bengals - Chandu

Shere Khan, a great selection. A known tiger. Easily outsmarted. Not the best representation for a team, outside of the fact that he strikes fear in other characters. All great points sure, but this NFL collab collection is meant to sell sell sell. No tiger, and I mean NO tiger would move as much merchandise as the cute, cuddly, seafaring tiger from Sindbad's Storybook Voyage at Tokyo DisneySea, Chandu. Slap this tiger on everything, we're sold. Take our money. Rajah from Aladdin walked so Chandu can run. They're all great, but give us Chandu.

Cleveland Browns - Barley Lightfoot

We get that Pluto was officially selected since Chomps the dog is already a mascot for Cleveland. We're gonna go deeper back to their mascot, Brownie the Elf, and call up Barley Lightfoot from Pixar's Onward. Ian, his younger brother, surely could be as well. But Barley seems more in line with a football mascot. If we stick with elves, we can also call up Wayne and Lanny from Prep & Landing, but we can just see Barley making a crowd get super enthusiastic.

Baltimore Ravens - JUST Diablo

Guys, come on. It's okay to not have Maleficent in everything. She's basically getting her own land at Walt Disney World soon. Let her Raven, Diablo, have the sole spotlight here. That's our request. Speaking of Magic Kingdom, we could also tap the Raven from the Haunted Mansion, who appears throughout the attraction. But Diablo is easier to print on a jersey.

Pittsburgh Steelers - Bender Bending Rodriguez

Okay, stay with me here. We've seen Marvel, we've seen Star Wars, we've seen Pixar. Disney now owns 20th Century Fox and properties like Futurama. How they didn't tap the steel bending character Bender Bending Rodriguez from that animated series as a mascot for the Pittsburgh Steelers, I'll never know. That said, after a bit of research the official selection of Pete makes sense. Donald Duck takes on high-altitude construction work in the classic 1940 theatrical short The Riveter as as a red-hot metal rivet gunner under his aggressive boss, Pete. Regardless of that bit of trivia, put Bender on the jersey.

Indianapolis Colts - Bullseye

More horses, the Colts official pick was Horace Horsecollar. A colt is a younger horse, and there is no horse I can think of with that childlike wonder and spirit besides Bullseye from the Toy Story films. Horace is a great choice, Bullseye might be the better one. Perhaps they were afraid of too much Toy Story as it is.

Jacksonville Jaguars - Jaguars

While Coco's Pepita takes to the skies as the official mascot for the Jaguars in this collab, we look to an actual pack of Jaguars - those from a climactic moment in The Emperor's New Groove. Pepita looks good, colorful, winged. Let's keep it down to earth, and they are quite literally a team of jaguars!

Houston Texans - Pecos Bill

While Jessie from the Toy Story films was tapped as the official mascot in the collab, I have to look to Disney's most famous animated actual Texan - Pecos Bill. The character, from 1948's Melody Time is notably from Texas. Perfect for a team called the "Texans."

Tennessee Titans - Titans from Hercules

Marvel's Thanos is a good pick, sure. But we all know, especially from this, I would pick Disney or Pixar animation characters before a Marvel one any day. And for the Tennessee Titans I would look to - again, like the Jaguars - an actual team of Titans. You know, like all the Titans that were unearthed in the 1997 film, Hercules. Now, if we can only get a collab that sees Hades as a coach or owner.

Denver Broncos - Phillipe from Beauty and the Beast

More horses! The official selection of Maximus from Tangled in this equine role is slightly misguided. Broncos are known for being rough and rowdy, and Maximus - especially while on duty - is quite well behaved and respectful of the law. While Phillipe from Beauty and the Beast may not be rough around the edges or the image of a horse that comes to mind when hearing "Bronco," Phillipe actually threw (quite literally) the whole story into motion when he got scared and bucked Belle, leaving her alone in the woods for the Beast to come save her. Just sayin'.

Los Angeles Chargers - Bolt

This team is heavily connected to the image of a lightning bolt, so immediately the thought of Pegasus and Hercules (the official selection) is so close but missed the mark. Zeus fires his lightning bolts. Maybe we want a protagonist as the mascot though? Let's look to Bolt from the film Bolt. Channeling only the image of the lightning bolt, why not pick a character known for the lightning bolt emblazoned on his body (Disney owned of course). Bolt features a lightning bolt across his fur coat. And is also just an action packed hero puppy.

Kansas City Chiefs - Jessie

We knew it. We knew you... would guess we picked this mascot solely based on personalities involved with this team and their connection to this character and Toy Story 5 and you'd be right. Alternatively, we could have also picked Kermit the Frog. For some reason, whenever we hear an MVP from this team in interviews we want to watch our favorite green Muppet ringleader. At least we can explain our choice more than the Big Bad Wolf.

Las Vegas Raiders - John Silver

Another form of pirate known for a surprise attack, we have to point to Treasure Planet's John Silver as the mascot for the Las Vegas Raiders. As he led the ultimate mutiny in the animated film and taught us all to "Beware the Cyborg." The official pick of Darth Vader is frightening sure, but the Empire is hardly a group of Pirates.

Do you agree with any of these picks? Check out more of the official Disney and NFL Champion Collab for the real goods, while we stew away in our imaginary world where these happened.