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You will have seen by now many recent Disney announcements. None of them matter anymore.

Star Wars Land? Trash it. I don’t care.

Toy Story Land? Worthless. Comparing it to Carsland as far as immersion goes doesn’t actually make sense.

Frozen replacing Aladdin at DCA? Sure, why not. In fact, do a second billion dollar redo of the park to make it all Frozen. Arendelle Screamin’. Anna’s Above Sea Adventure. Olafland.

Nothing matters to me more than the disgusting, despicable, ridiculous, infuriating, and down right insulting announcement that appeared on September 11th, because timing is everything?

It was announced that 2015 will be the final year of the Osborne Spectacle of Dancing Lights. The key thing that brings in crowds to an otherwise half-day park from November-January is leaving. A beloved Disney World tradition is leaving.

Because of Toy Story Land and Star Wars Land construction, the Streets of America will seemingly be torn down, leading to the demise of the most magical Christmas entertainment at the parks. Star Wars Land construction, slated to begin next year, will close a WDW institution. Star Wars Land, an announcement made with no substantial details whatsoever, trumps strings of lights.

Let’s go back to when Lights, Motors, ACTION! was being built on a large piece of the Backlot Tour’s route. Residential Street, former home to the Osborne Lights, was torn down in the process, thus needing a new place to showcase the lights, leading to their move to the Streets of America. Now, I don’t know if the Disney executives who cut this don’t know that lights can be moved, or maybe the head person who made this decision is Ebeneezer Scrooge, but they can be moved again, it won’t bother anyone.

Here are some possible options of where the Lights can feasibly go:

  • Disney Springs-The amount of people who have sworn off the place due to construction making it a pain in the butt to get to/making into an actual mall could fill up 19 copies of War and Peace. Cover the new, large buildings that are close to completion with lights and it will bring in thousands of people who will love the lights, and maybe even buy some flip-flops at one of the, and I’m not making this up, 7 places you can currently buy shoes.
  • Main Street U.S.A.- You light up the Castle with the same darn lights you use for Osborne, why not lead up to the castle with lights too? You can take away some of the more abrasive tunes (Anything Mannheim Steamroller can go away) and add in all instrumental pieces that would still fit Main Street. Or, just say screw it and pull a Halloween Party and play whatever the heck you want. When I first thought of this idea I was like “That’s ridiculous,” but the more I thought about it, it could work very nicely.
  • Any freaking location on property- You could cover the Tree of Life, the Cast Connection store or the Old Key West pool water slide and I would go. Just keep them!

They have been cutting back on holiday entertainment for a while now (Lights of Winter? Really, y’all? That still doesn’t make sense), so this fits their current theme. If it is a Christmas faux-pas issue, I totally get it. Let’s include others in the mix, I’m all for it. Separate the lights into Xmas, Hanukkah and Kwanzaa sections, I’m so there. Just keep them.

I’d rather have no Star Wars, no Toy Story and no Fantasmic in DHS than getting rid of the Osborne Lights. I’d rather attend my second New Year’s Eve at DHS to hear Mulch, Sweat and Shears miss midnight by three minutes (that night was really awkward, not gonna lie). I’d rather jump off the Earffel Tower. I just need those lights to stay.

Disney, you’ve been making some decisions lately that are ticking off the fan base and I’m really depressed by the whole thing. Making everything a surcharge, replacing everything with Frozen, taking away rocker bagpipes with chainsaws, etc. This is one decision that needs to be stopped at all costs. Call them the Frozen Spectacle of Dancing Lights. Heck, call them the Treasure Planet Spectacle of Dancing Lights. Just keep them.

The magic of the holiday season is never more palpable than stepping into the Streets of America on a crisp December evening, seeing the falling snow (even if it always messes up my glasses), and listening to classic Christmas tunes while gazing at the facades all aglow. Disney, y’all love magic. I love magic. Everyone loves magic. Keep the lights.

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